Women need to advocate for women too

When people talk about gender diversity in engineering, the conversation often focuses on how men can be better allies, how they can open doors for women and champion female colleagues. And while that’s important, there’s something else we need to talk about – something I’ve learned through years of working in a male-dominated industry: women need to advocate for women too.

My journey into engineering

I grew up surrounded by engineering. My dad was an engineer, and for my 16th birthday, I got my first toolbox – probably not the typical gift for a teenage girl, but it suited me perfectly. I loved taking things apart, figuring out how they worked, and putting them back together again. It was obvious to me that engineering was where I belonged.

I studied Mechanical Engineering at Reading University, later moving into a PhD sponsored by the Institution of Mechanical Engineers. My work focused on ballistics, explosives, and protective equipment – not your average office job! From there, I carved out a career in aerospace, working on ejection seats and cockpit interiors, even measuring Top Gun pilots to design ergonomic seating. I later transitioned into leadership roles, tackling complex operational challenges and making critical business decisions.

But throughout my career, one of the biggest challenges I’ve faced hasn’t been the technical work itself – it’s been navigating the workplace as a woman in engineering.

The reality of being a woman in a male-dominated industry

Engineering is still a very masculine space. It’s competitive, results-driven, and often feels like you have to prove yourself over and over again. Throughout my career, I have worked tirelessly to demonstrate that I am just as capable as my male colleagues – often putting in longer hours, saying yes to everything, and taking on additional responsibilities to show I can handle it.

And then, of course, there’s the ever-present challenge of balancing career and family. When I went on maternity leave, I worried – would I still have the same opportunities when I returned? Would I be seen as less committed? It’s something many women in STEM (and beyond) grapple with, even in companies that are fully supportive.

Women need to have each other’s backs

But here’s something I wasn’t prepared for when I started my career: some of the toughest moments I’ve had weren’t from men doubting me – they were from other women.

There’s this unspoken pressure in male-dominated industries. You work so hard to climb the ladder that when you get there, the instinct can be to protect your space rather than open it up for others. I’ve seen women undermine each other, question each other’s decisions, and – instead of being allies – become roadblocks. I’ve experienced it myself.

And that needs to change.

Recently, I’ve been incredibly lucky to work with some fantastic women who have supported me, mentored me, and encouraged me. For much of my career, that wasn’t my experience - I found this support after joining a women’s empowerment training course and cohort. Before that, my support system was almost entirely male. Experiencing both sides has made me even more aware of how much harder things can be when that network isn’t there. Women should be lifting each other up, not tearing each other down. We should be celebrating each other’s successes, advocating for each other in meetings, and making sure we all have a seat at the table – rather than fighting over the one chair that’s been made available. We should be opening the door and bringing in more chairs!

The change starts with us

We talk a lot about male allies – and yes, they have a role to play. But the real power lies with us. If we want more women in engineering, more women in leadership, more women succeeding on their own terms, then we need to be part of that change. We need to mentor, support, and advocate for the next generation of women in STEM.

If you’re a woman in a senior role, take the time to mentor someone coming up behind you. If you’re in a meeting and see another woman being spoken over, speak up. If you hear someone questioning a woman’s capabilities in a way they wouldn’t for a man, challenge it. And most importantly, if you see a woman succeeding, celebrate it – because her success doesn’t take away from yours.

We can’t just wait for men to change the culture of our workplaces. We have to do it too. And it starts with supporting each other.

So let’s step up. Let’s be the allies we all need.